It's been a long time since I've sat at the keyboard to write a software
review
for a "new" piece of Apple software. I really didn't believe that
anyone would
produce anything of merit; especially in these days of Windows!
On, or about, Thanksgiving Day (U.S. version), Nathan Mates, the self-anointed
savior of copyrighted software, released Turkey
Shoot GS. It is the latest attack
on Nathan's personal demon, Charles "Dr. Tom" Turley. The premise
of the game is
that there is a Turkey (read "Turley") out pirating software.
(Performing
off-site storage as those in the know call it!) Turkey, and his followers,
continue to spread pirated (read "off-site stored") software to
the dismay of
honest software developers (read Nathan) who can't make a living selling
Apple
software. (Reality check needed! Survive by developing Apple software? Maybe
if
you live at the YMCA or at home with Mama.)
Your job is to eliminate the turkeys by shooting them as they run, walk
and roll
across the screen dropping their pirated ("off-site storage")
disks. Oh, you also
have to shoot the dropping disks or they will knock down your health level.
Turkey
Shoot GS is wall-to-wall shooting. Wipe out the turkey and it may drop
bullets or health packets so that you can continue the fight against evil
and
injustice. As a special added attraction, Nathan included a super powerful
nuking
device that is activated by pressing the space bar. It wipes out everything
on
the screen. This device is very helpful if you've run out of bullets. If
you nuke
a turkey it may drop more ammo for your use.
Nathan billed this game as including a lot of carnage; as shoot-em-ups go,
you
won't be disappointed. There is gun fire and gobbling, but no blood. You
control
your gunsite by moving your mouse and fire by clicking the mouse button.
That's
about all there is to it!
The graphics are smooth and the sounds are appropriate. However, all is
not
perfect with Turkey
Shoot. The most obvious problem is the blatant attacks on
Charles Turley. Nathan takes his self-proclaimed "Christian
life-style" down the
toilet with his festering hate (a good name for a virus). I'm not sure what
"Christian"
beliefs that Nathan has, but I'll gladly become a pagan if this is
what Christianity
and a Christian life
style is all about! For more on Nathan's
Christian belief,
check out his website. It's full of bible quotes and
references.
A problem with the game is that it's not intelligent enough to know when
you are
out of all forms of ammo (bullets and turkey nukers). Instead of the game
ending
when all hopes of replenishing your ammo supply evaporate; you are forced
to
watch and listen to turkeys until your health is gone. Is this a major problem?
No, just a minor inconvenience.
If you are fortunate enough to get a high score in Turkey
Shoot , you will see a
screen that contains those famous words "just say no." How quaint!
When you're
done playing you will get more propaganda from Mr. Mates. He will direct
you to
sites on the Internet that contain more character assassinations. There
are also
plugs for his website (portions are not accessible by AOL users) and for
his new game.
As I have posted in the CSA2 newsgroup; any new GS game is refreshing. Even
if it
means turkey carnage. The price is right; freeware! The character assassination
belongs in a court room. Get a copy
if you can find it!
It's
fun once you get
your "waders" on!
Here's a bit of Nathan's ranting that comes directly from his documentation
file.
Legal Stuff:
This program is distribution-restricted freeware. It is NOT public domain;
it IS
copyrighted (c) by me, Nathan Mates,
all rights reserved. This program will be
uploaded first to Delphi.com, the best place for flame-free beneficial Apple
II
support. [Free www-only accounts are available; drop by http://www.delphi.com].
For those familiar with the CSA2 newsgroup, the next to the last sentence
quoted
above will cause regular visitors to bust a gut. The master flame thrower
is none
other than Mr. (and I use the term loosely) Mates.
A2-2000 Editor Note: ITwas
indeed uploaded first to Delphi. But, IT
currently is not available from Delphi. Nor does ITappear
to be available from Genie or anyother publication, online service, web
site or ftp site (other than Nathans). You can download your own Shrinkit
archive of IT
from any of the highlighted links within this review, with the
exceptions of the highlighted links; 'Nathan Mates, Christian, facts' and
field' .
The following quote from the documentation file is my favorite:
You're in charge of a nice area of Apple II users, when a group of idiotic
turkeys who know nothing better than to be jerks and pirate decide to invade.
Not
good. So, you pull out your trusty shotgun and show the turkeys who's boss.
However, they refuse to listen to reality or the facts
, and keep swarming, keep
pirating. How long can you survive?
And in the end, the turkeys conquer the field
. How apropos!
